Today is my last day taking classes at the Seattle School. I had the last class with the man with whom I came to study. This is the last time that I get to sit in class with my friends, learning from them. It is a day of sorrow and joy. It is a day where I need to embrace saying goodbye. I've spent three years in these hallowed halls. I've laughed and cried here with women and men that I've grown to call friends. This place has given me so much. There is no way to adequately express my gratitude for the men and women who've taught me:
Dan Allender is the man who drew me north. I don't know if I've ever met such a brilliant human who is simultaneously kind beyond measure. O'Donnel Day shaped my understanding of the basic construction of the human mind. She continually surprised me with gentle strength that helped me understand things that I thought were well beyond me. Roy Barsness taught me how to love my clients in life changing ways, and he redirected my theological metaphors so that they can give more life. Steve Call taught me to be gently curious and patient. His calming manner regulates entire rooms of people. Dwight Friesen daily revealed Jesus to me, and in so doing gave me a living example of who pastors are called to be. Chelle Stearns and Ron Ruthruff introduced me to new theological friends. They gave me the freedom to explore and helped me make interesections between theology and psychology. Stephanie Neil and Christie Lynk taught me ethics repeating nearly every week -- "Don't do meth and don't sleep with your clients and you'll be fine." No one teaches ethics like they do. And that is true well beyond their running joke. I've listed only the faculty that directly impacted me, changing and growing me. I haven't listed my classmates who challenged me, walked with me, and never letting me hide. They are who I will miss most. They are who have molded me the most.
If that isn't enough, next week I will say goodbye to all of my clients at my internship site. It is an abrupt and unexpected ending. It is not easy to tell them I am going, and their tears break my heart. I'm also saying goodby to staff and my supervisor and my fellow interns who have worked with me side by side. I have to say goodbye to the case managers and the chaplain who daily pour out their lives for these men and women who live on the margins of society.
We're taught at the Seattle School, and I believe it to be true, that we need good endings to have good beginnings. Death always precedes resurrection. Life comes out of death. In this season, I am learning to end. It requires that I remember, celebrate, and grieve the life I've been blessed to live these past few months and years. I get to look ahead to the hope I hold and plan how that future might become reality.
We don't know how to end well. Ending well is hard. May I do that which is hard, and finish well.
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