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04 January 2007


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Aaron Kelly

I was just thinking back on my past relationship experiences this evening and I realized that there was this tremendous fear involved, at least at first. It was abnormal (I couldn't sleep for the whole night.) and I thought it was normal. Now I realize that it was an expression of the obsession that comes with my disease. At least that's what I realized this evening after having a great time just casually hanging out with someone. That no matter how great it goes or how well I am able to stay casual I will still have the obsession and need to turn over the obsession to God. It's a part of the disease as much as any other part has been.

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