Promises

Love Wins

Rob Bell has a video clip out introducing his new book, Love Wins.

I posted this clip on Facebook and then immediately posted a link to a CNN article that reviews the pushback against Bell’s apparent universalism (the idea that everyone is saved) . I do not know if Bell is a Universalist or not. I haven’t had a chance to pick up his book yet. I fear that many of the people that are attacking him don’t know what he has to say either, but that is an altogether different issue.

Because I know people that know him (though I don’t personally) I can say without hesitation that Bell is passionately in love with Jesus; is committed to living in Jesus’ Kingdom so long as he breathes; that he loves and cares about people very deeply. It figures, given what some are saying about him, that is not enough, however. 

Immediately friends began to comment about the topic. You can see the whole thread here. Me -- I'm pretty agnostic about it. My friend said what I think better than I could:

"...I am not so concerned with whether there is a heaven or hell. I am not living to avoid one or go to the other. I am living for one who is worthy of all my devotion no matter what happens after. I am not afraid of deception or heresy, ask the tough questions, but in the end I think the best way to ask the question is to change the direction the question is sent. Jer. 17:9 ("The human heart is the most deceitful of all things,and desperately wicked.Who really knows how bad it is?" Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved. ) is often quoted without even finishing the verse, much less adding the next one (Jer 17:10 "But I, the Lord, search all hearts and examine secret motives. I give all people their due rewards, according to what their actions deserve.") and certainly not adding chapter 31. I don’t think I will know the mysteries of God so much by searching him out as by asking him to search me out. Inviting him into the deep waters of my own heart to search me and reveal me. Than I have more and more freedom to know him and the power of his resurrection. I don’t testify to the goodness and love of God to help people avoid hell or to earn rewards in heaven. I will testify because he is good and full of love and both his judgements and mercy are right. Let him be God.The human heart is the most deceitful of all things,and desperately wicked.Who really knows how bad it is?" -- Kent or Melanie Hempel

That being said, in the comment thread I was asked to explain my problems with Hell. And so here I sit typing...

In order to do so let me re-tell the gospel story as I understand it, in short-form fashion: Before there was a single star in the heavens or a galaxy to hold them, there was an eternal party going on. God -- the Almighty Three-in-One was having a blow out, and in the midst of this eternal, blow-out party he decided to create others who could join in the party. Even creation was a selfless act of love. He created so that we could all party with Him.

Now the Almighty Three-in-One was completely selfless. His holiness ("otherness," or "aboveness") came from the fact that he was simply "LOVE". His creation proved not to be. Indeed, we proved to be all about self -- self-aggrandizement, self-centeredness, egotistical, narcissistic, and fearful that we would be found out to be less than we needed others to think us to be. We were moving faster than warp 9 away from LOVE and love; toward complete isolation.

Then in an act of amazing grace, the Almighty Three-in-One intervened. God died. He came and in the greatest act of love ever, let selfishness, fear, hate, envy, pride, deceit, murder, betrayal and isolation win. The eternal party that had never previously been interrupted came to a screeching halt. Mourning ensued for three days. But death couldn't hold LOVE, and LOVE burst fromt he grave in a life-giving resurrection. By surrendering to the forces that stood against love and by dying LOVE won. 

It was made clear by God himself that the only way that life could ever be found by us was through the death of self. And the only way we could ever trust enough to die was because He did it first, and was willing to give Himself to us so that we could follow in His steps. If, as He fills us, we trust him enough to kill ourselves each day we find life that transcends the death we'd been living in our own power. If there is one truth in the gospel story it is this: Death always proceeds Resurrection. 

So what does this have to do with hell?  Let me try to explain: In the West we have been taught to think that life is about a series of bounded sets. The Christianity I grew up in taught me this. So long as I believed the right things, said the right prayers, and occasionally did the right things, my eternal destiny was certain. I could rest in the loving hands of my Saviour Jesus who was faithful to never let me down.

This belief sprung out of a Foundationalist philosophy that taught that there was ultimate truth out there we could capture and rest our faith upon. In so doing we would be standing on a Rock and our faith could be sure. Lots of people still live in this head space. I do not think they are wrong though I don't understand them. That is simply how they process the world. They still trust. But they trust differently than me. That is OK.

I process the world differently. Brian May, the lead guitarist for Queen, and a Doctor in Astro-physics, wrote a dissertation tracking space dusts' path through the universe. He found that everything was moving away from the centre. He argues that we are moving outward toward something he calls "complete isolation."

I think that he is right and that the physical is a mirror of the Spiritual. I've come to view spirituality as being about a "Centred-set" rather than a "bounded-set". At the centre is the Almighty Three-in-One, who continually beckons us to join his eternal, once-interupted party that shines more brightly than any star in his multi-lit universe. Meanwhile, so long as we stay on the trajectory of self that we find ourself on, we move toward complete isolation and loneliness. We become gods of our own reality, cut off from all other life. To me that is hell, for it is life without LOVE or love which flows from LOVE.

The only way we find life is through death. "If you want to save your life, you must lose it..." Jesus said (And then He demonstrated what He meant). I don't think he was kidding. I can think of nothing more horrid than clinging to life only to find ultimate aloneness and death. In my understanding, this hell is the natural consequence of our own desires. 

I don't think this violates the intention of Scripture. But I could easily be wrong. This is simply a word constructed picture that works for me to explain an eternal reality I won't fully understand until I pass through the veil myself.

Into this framework, I can accept some people who don't even know the name of Jesus choosing love, never knowing that it is because of Jesus' sacrifice they discovered love in the first place. While others who claim the name of Jesus choose against love and for themselves.

When Jesus came he lived outside of the box of what Jews thought a Messiah should look like. Many rejected him because he didn't look or live in a way that matched up to the pictures they'd been raised with that a Messiah looked like. So they missed him. Looking back we can see that they simply misinterpreted the pictures given all those years before in the Old Testament.

I wonder if we are not guilty of doing the same thing. We force the words of the Bible into our cultural understanding of them and miss what God was really trying to say. In so doing we communicate poorly and people tune us out. I know I do that all the time, despite my best efforts not to.

Hell to me is not so much about wrath and anger. My understanding is that all God's anger at how I betrayed him was poured out on Jesus at the cross. No, my understanding of Hell is that it is a natural consequence of turning our backs on LOVE and love and the Almighty Three-in-One giving us what we ask for.

Part 2 of Step 1: We admitted we were powerless and our lives had become unmanageable

I grew up reading the New Testament as if it were a personal letter to me rather than to a group called to gather together to live out the Kingdom of God on earth. When “you” becomes plural the New Testament’s meaning shifts. In part that is why, “We admitted we…”

We admit a common problem. We admit two separate but connected truths. If someone misses one of these two truths, they are unable to take this step. Perhaps a story would help here:

Jesus was walking with his ragamuffin followers when this BMW 7 series pulled up. A young, good looking guy hopped out, not caring that he double parked and ran up to Jesus and got down on his knees before him.

“Good teacher, how do I to get to heaven?” he asked.

After Jesus finished setting him straight about calling him “good” (no one is good but G-d) he to obey all of the ten commandments and he listed the second half of them(He skipped the first four commandments that had to do with relating to G-d.)

The man responded as most good conservative Christians would, “I’ve kept all those commands since I was a boy” (or a “wee lad” if you are in Great Britain).

Jesus didn’t contradict him. Instead he stated, “You’re missing one thing. Go sell everything you have and give it away to the poor. Then come and follow me.”

In one fell swoop, Jesus made the claim to be G-d and let the man know that though he felt powerless over his eternal destiny, life was pretty good; too good to give up for something possibly coming tomorrow, and the man left to live his life in comfort and ease.

Lots of people can acknowledge powerlessness without acknowledging unmanageability. Many others can acknowledge unmanageability without acknowledging powerlessness.

In the West we’ve got it pretty good. Even the poorest among us live more comfortably than most of the rest of the world’s population. We have more wealth, and physical health than the world has ever known. We make Solomon look like a pauper.

Only those too weak carry the weight of their own shame or sin, or those so reprobate that they destroy their loves or their own lives seem able to admit their helpless estate.

Very few seem able to see the Matrix for what it is. Even fewer swallow the red pill and see the ruins that surround them. We live our lives in a fog that appears to be crystal clear. That fog hides the real and all too many live in a blissful unreality that ultimately damns them to an eternity of the same nothingness that haunts them from afar everyday of their fallacious lives.

Those that do break under the weight of the lie we all live, often are able to take this step. It is the first step back toward the Garden. It is the first step toward God.

My Solution

     We saw that our problem was bigger than anything we could imagine. We saw that without help we were condemned to hopelessness, despair, and isolation.

     We found hope when we admitted that we were powerless to change all the things that needed to be changed. Indeed we discovered that we were mortally sick – to the point of death. Our Lord said it this way, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do… I have come to call sinners, not those who think they are already good enough.” (Matthew 9.12-13, New Living Translation).

     We discovered that we connected to life when we surrendered our rights and looked to the Spirit and friends for support. We had to stop lying to ourselves, to God, and our world.

We had to stop submitting ourselves to a culture that encouraged dishonesty, and seemed to demand that we put on our game faces to show up. We had to learn to trust others and share our weaknesses so that we could discover strength together. We stopped “knowing” and started listening. We stopped “telling” and started “asking,” and listening.   

     All this was incredibly frightening. We couldn’t see where we are going, still can’t for that matter. That is why we call it faith. Each new step of surrender feels like its going to kill us and be our last. People in our world and religious people who think we should be a part of their world don’t understand this. And we certainly don’t get it, but we’re taking the steps anyway, keeping our eyes on Jesus, who endured the cross scorning its shame, pointing the way we are to walk. Instead of killing us, faith and surrender are killing our obsessions. We are stepping into the light, into a whole new way of life, one that is better than we ever dreamed we could live.

     Having acknowledged our weaknesses and powerlessness to God, ourselves and our fellows, with our friends by our side we ask God for help. We don’t have to do anything alone any more. We continually give up demanding anything; seeking rather to gladly accept all that God offers us – both “good” and “bad”.

     With the encouragement of our friends we give up our need to control life, let go of our fears, and begin looking at how we interact with the rest of creation. Our friends support us and keep us from being overwhelmed. Their honest fellowship provides a safe haven where we can finally face ourselves and tell the truth. Instead of covering our feelings with our idols and addictions, we begin exposing the roots of our isolation. We ask for the Holy Spirit to fill us and shine His light upon all parts of our lives. He does so with amazing results.

     As we begin living in the light and face our defects, we become willing to change; surrendering our defects breaks the power they have over us. We begin feeling more comfortable with ourselves and others for the first time without our “drugs”.

     We become accountable for our wrong actions and start making amends for them where appropriate. At each amends more of the dreadful load of guilt drops from our shoulders until we lift our heads from shame to grace, look people in the eye, and stand free. Amazed at the forgiveness offered to us, we forgive anyone who injures us. As we forgive, we experience the promises of God which we had tried to obtain on our own.

     We take the action to love others well. We learn to give instead of take and discover that the measure we give is the measure we get back. We continually find what we lost. We make the real Connection. We know that we’re on the way home.

My Human Problem

Many of us felt inadequate, unworthy, alone and afraid. Our insides never matched what we saw on the outsides of others.***

     Early on, we came to feel disconnected. We tuned out our fear and pain through any number of idolatrous diversions: food, fantasy, perceived control, a relationship, sex, alcohol, drugs, work, media; anything that could keep us from facing ourselves or God.

     We ran to our idols looking for something… anything that could speak to our souls. We did not like the way God was providing our world to us and so we demanded a different one, which He seemed unwilling to provide. We found relief in our idols when God refused to give us what we demanded. Our idols seemed much better. We could control them.

     The only way we knew to stop the pain was to look to our idols to provide for us what only the Trinity could provide. We asked people to fill a void in our lives that they could not possibly fill. In so doing, we alienated them and pushed them away even as we cried for them to come closer. Progressively we moved farther away from our Creator and his creation, destroying any chance of healing, freedom and real life.

     Our idols produced guilt, self-hatred, remorse, emptiness and pain, and yet we knew we would die without them.  Our idolatry led to addiction. We were stuck and we were dying. We found ourselves driven inward, into a virtual reality of our own making, away from reality, and away from love. We were lost inside of ourselves, isolated, and alone.

     Our self absorption made real connections and intimacy impossible. We never knew true union with the Real, or any of His creation because we clung to the unreal. We craved control, adrenalin, safety, chemistry, and / or freedom from pain, fear and control of others. We created virtual ‘unreal’ worlds that existed in our minds and online, and they corrupted the real world God had made. The powerless, selfish “I” killed love. And we found ourselves falling off the edge into isolating, unmanageable insanity.

***1st paragraph borrowed verbatim from the White Book, Roy K.

Thoughts on Church buildings and waste

A couple of weeks ago I received a letter from one of my friends in India asking if we would sponsor their building a church building. If we did, they would call it the "Ruth & John Grant Memorial Church." A little bit of my heart broke off as I read the letter.

As Dad and I travelled with this very pastor across Maharashtra a little under three years ago we spoke of the way that American Missions had taken the worst of our culture as well as the best with us as we tried to proclaim Jesus and that the idea that material opulence in church buildings was part of that sin.

In India more than 600 million people live on less than $2.00 a day. Somehow they survive. Here a pastor wants several thousand dollars to erect an additional church building when they already have a compound built as an orphanage. Something is out of kilter.

Unpacking some of my library I came across two books that speak to this issue. The first is by John Alexander. It was never published so it sits on my shelf in two notebooks. Its title says it all, Stop Going to Church and Be the Church. “How can we go to something we are?” he asks. Yet, that is the nature of how we think: “Do you want to go to church today?” Or, “Come on kids, we’re late for church!” we yell angrily because we are going to look bad, arriving late for the church gathering.

The second book, The Torch of the Testimony, makes the statement that if the evangelical church in North America was to divest of all it’s property the church would have over two billion dollars to spend on feeding the poor, clothing the destitute, and generally fulfilling the great commission of our Lord, Jesus.

One of my favourite churches is called the Evergreen Community. Because it meets in pubs throughout Portland, my wife and I were married in a Pub. I think it is one of the best possible partnerships. The pub isn’t going to open on Sunday morning (because it is not a sports pub). And so their space goes unused. Some of the church stick around to have lunch also helping the pub’s bottom line. The elder who preaches encourages people to tip well and most do. Jesus smiles.

Now, if you talk to the church planter that started it all he will tell you that not having a building sucks sometimes. Evergreen is truly missional and wants to be involved in feeding the poor and clothing the homeless. But because they have no building, they forgo the opportunity for a food pantry or a clothing bin for the homeless. In today’s day and age, there is little need for an office, though at times it would be nice and having a print center could be a great cost savings. There is a cost to not having a building.

Matt Hannan is a pastor at another of my favourite churches, New Heights, in Vancouver. A few years ago the church truly was out of space. They were meeting five times a weekend because there weren’t enough seats in the building for everyone to sit. Matt, who is probably Portland’s preeminent preacher was running out of voice by Sunday night, and the energy outlay of the weekend had to take it’s toll on his effectiveness during the week. However, when the church planned expansion they didn’t plan a seat for everyone. Instead they planned to still have three services and so they planned their expansion accordingly to save dollars so they would have more to throw into church planting and community engagement.

Another church here in Portland partnered with local businesses to build their building as part of a retail, and office space complex. By partnering with business the cost to each party was less than it otherwise would have been.

There is no right answer to these questions. And so even I have a suggestion to add to the mix. It might help someone somewhere. Let’s see. What if several church’s here in Portland that do not own their own building got together to lease space together… not to meet mind you, but for mission purposes. An old warehouse could be turned into a copy center, food pantry, clothes closet, or who knows what else, people could share the space. Church communities could work together to make it functional and fir their needs. Costs could be shared and kept low, and so congregations that could not afford their own space might be able to share space.

I fear that this would only work if the commitment of the leadership was to not see this as a stepping stone, “until we can afford more” but as a commitment to Kingdom values, and doing it in order to be missional. Anything less would lead to outward selfishness, conflict, and eventual collapse of the venture.  

Many of us felt inadequate, unworthy, alone and afraid. Our insides never matched what we saw on the outsides of others. Early on, we came to feel disconnected. We tuned out our pain through any number of idolatrous diversions: a relationship or sex, food, alcohol, drugs, work, fantasy, media, and trying to control everyone and everything else; anything that could keep us from facing ourselves or our God. We ran to our idols looking for something… anything that could speak to our souls. We did not like the way God was providing our world to us and so we demanded a different one, which He seemed unwilling to provide. We found relief in our idols when God refused to give us what we demanded. They were much better. We could control them. We became true addicts. The only way we knew to stop the pain was to look to our idols to provide for us what only the Trinity could provide. We asked people to fill a void in our lives that they could not possibly fill. In so doing, we alienated them and pushed them away even as we cried for them to come closer. Progressively we moved farther away from our Creator and his creation, destroying any chance of healing, freedom and real life. Our idols produced guilt, self-hatred, remorse, emptiness and pain, and yet we knew we would die without them. We were stuck and we were dying. We found ourselves driven inward, into a virtual reality of our own making, away from reality, and away from love. We were lost inside of ourselves. Our self absorption made real connections and intimacy impossible. We never knew true union with the Real, or any of His creation because we clung to the unreal. We craved control, adrenalin, safety, chemistry, and / or freedom from pain, fear and control of others. We created virtual ‘unreal’ worlds that existed in our minds and online, and they corrupted the real world God had made. The powerless, selfish “I” killed love. And we found ourselves falling of the edge of isolating, unmanageable insanity.

Addicted to Ourselves

            To understand what we mean when we use the phrase, “addicted to myself,” we must understand our history. Before God created the angels or even just one star; when He was all that was; He was love. He was love because He was triune. Everything that is good and right in relationship, all the things we pray, and long for in relationships were found in the Eternal Relationship between Father, Son and Holy Spirit. And then that wonderful, all powerful, perfect relationship created us in His own image (see, Genesis 1:26-27) so that we would join and enjoy the eternal party.

          Along the way though, we discovered selfish desire, and pride. The temptation in the garden was away from love, toward self-aggrandizement. We moved away from relationship and toward isolation. And to our dismay we found it.

          We can only speak about our own journey and our own experiences in life. Our story seems to mirror the story of the Garden of Eden. We took ourselves out of the arena of love and  discovered the dark world of self serving -- looking out for ourselves before anything else.

We are powerless over our plight. No matter how hard we try, all of our actions are tainted by selfish desires. Our situation is not much different from the alcoholic, or the addict. We lust. We define lust as, “Demanding that my world be different than the way God is giving it to me.”

This is our life. We don’t like how our world is handed to us – it hurts -- so we take control and strive to change it for our own perceived benefit. 

We repeatedly fail. At times we fool ourselves into believing everything is working perfectly but discover that our world is still crumbling around us. All our efforts to remake Love in our own image fail. In an effort to ease our pain, we become what the world calls “addicts”. We try to live free, "unhindered" by God. We are stubborn. All that we create is a mere façade draped over the real problem -- our own selfishness, but still we build, hoping the next time will be different. It never is.

The only hope we have is the cross of Jesus. Our understanding of His phrase, “Take up your cross daily and follow me,” takes on new meaning. All of a sudden we realize that to be free of self we must continually kill self. The death of self is a slow process of continual surrender. We continually surrender all of our entitlements, dreams, and aspirations; all of our possessions, our rights, and our relationships. We repeatedly turn their care over to God, trusting Him with everything. We ask only that He  connect with us restoring us to relationship with Him and our fellows. In so doing, we experience his power and love in our lives. And we marvel that restored relationship is what He wants more than anything else.

We did not want to believe most of these things – only the pleasant ones – but our journey forced us to accept them as facts. As we accepted them we slowly discovered a real connection accompanied by a new sense of freedom and joy we never before experienced.

These realities scare many people off. Many of us want an easier path of structured religion, and hope we can still get the payoff. We want real connection but also to hold onto self. Holding onto self will not allow us to find the connection we seek. Like the rich young ruler, unable to give up his belongings when asked, we end up going away from the face of Love – sad.

It is not until we have reached the end of ourselves that we will or can walk this path. It is too difficult, and too painful. For it not only lies in the shadow of the cross but encompasses it.

This is a place for those people who are desperate enough for a real connection to the Triune God that they will go to any lengths to discover Him. Only people at the end of themselves ever truly reach out for the hand of Love – the hand of God himself.

Limited Atonement

If you aren't a universalist, you believe in limited atonement. It simply states that not everyone will be saved. That was the easiest explanation I've had the privilege of making.

I think I believe in limited limited atonement. What I mean is that I don't believe everyone will get to party with the Trinity in heaven, and yet I think far more will than most Christians believe will. I think it is a minority that end up choosing eternity away from the party rather than a minority that are chosen for eternity at the party. I hope that is clear.

Its all Gonna Burn

    I'm sitting watching the "stuff" of my childhood and adolescence walk out the door of our house during the first of two estate sales. We're selling items for a fraction of what they are worth because that is the nature of estate sales in today's economy.
    I'm realizing, as memories walk out the door, that it really is going to all burn someday. My parents spent over 60 years collecting the stuff that we are selling. They shaped the comfort of our home and their hospitality using the china, the crystal, the kitchenware, and the furniture. The lives of hundreds and thousands of people were shaped because of the words in hundreds of books that we are selling today.
    The memories that go with the "stuff" can't be sold. Those are indelibly burned into my synapses and neurons. They will go with me into eternity. The stuff. It is all gonna burn. My attachments have to be loose. Some things hurt me as they leave, but I can wish the people that are buying the "stuff" as much joy as they gave us and bless them and gain far more than I am loosing.
    This weekend is a great reminder that I need to  be about the stuff of Heaven rather than the stuff that is gonna burn. If I am not, I end up slowly dying a spiritual death that hurts far more than watching stuff march out the door.

The Sermon I Didn't Preach

My friends all told me not to preach the sermon I was going to preach at my Dad's memorial service. They told me that the content was great but the text was clearly causing problems, and encouraged me to simply say the things I wanted to say from a different source. It is hard to do when you have been trained as an expositor but I did the best I could.

But below is the sermon I wanted to preach it honours a man I called Dad for revealing my heavenly Dad to me in ways that I had previously missed. So here goes:

They say that one of the ways we understand God is through how our parents parented. I am grateful and blessed to have been parented by a less than perfect but incredibly Godly man who revealed God to me in too many ways to enumerate. The way I want to get there is by looking at a chapter in Luke's gospel where Jesus is talking to a group of Pharisees about what God is like. The picture he gave them was a picture that Dad gave me. The picture was given because Jesus clearly did not think that the Pharisees were revealing God the way they should have been. So inherent in the message today is a challenge to be God to the world the way he wants us to be. We claim to be the Body of Christ and we need to be faithful to who he was, not who we want him to be.

So when we look at the text Jesus tells three stories. The first is about a shepherd that goes out to look for a lost sheep while leaving the other 99 roaming about the hillside. My Dad did that during the first part of my brother's and my lives. He was gone as much as he was home. He left us to seek the lost and bring them home. He was doing what his heavenly Father asked him to do. He left that which was most important to him to seek those who were insignificant and even unknown to him.

I have a friend who told his son that he was the most important boy in the world but no more important than any other boy in the world. I'm not sure that is a message I would communicate to my son, but it is a God-like message. My Dad lived that out for me. I could be no more important than any other breathing human. I didn't learn this well until late, but my Dad helped teach me this awful and yet wonderful truth. I am not, nor should I be the centre of God's world.

In the second parable Jesus talks about a woman sweeping out her whole house to find a lost coin. That is so not me. I lose something and most the time I shrug and say, "I guess I wasn't supposed to have it anyway." or, "It'll show up." The exceptions to this are when I am completely stimied without whatever it is lost; like lets say -- my keys, or my wallet when I am already completely out of gas. This is the picture Jesus paints of God frantically looking for what he lost.

Now I am going to make a suggestion here that the pharisees would not have heard this as "God lost individuals searches for them and rejoices when they are found." No, they would have heard, God lost a relationship with his people and is searching for it and when he re-connects he rejoices.

Right up until his last day, when people were coming to see him, Dad would have moments of joyful recognition. William, a grandson he hadn't seen in a long time came in and Dad's eyes opened, his face lit up and all he could say was,"Oh!" but everyone new the expression of delight because Dad loved that way. God loves that way. He loves loving. He loves relationship and he can get pissy when he doesn't have it. Many of us would simply say, "Its karma, baby..." but in reality all it is is God getting pissy cause we keep giving Him the finger.

The last parable of the three that Jesus tells is one of my favorite passages of Scripture. Remember who Jesus was telling the story to and for what reason. He wanted these religious folk to catch a glimpse of who God really was and hence who they should be.

The story itself is simple. The younger of two sons goes to his father and tells him that he wishes he were dead and he wanted all his share of the money now. His Dad, because he loved him, let him go. Off he went, blew all the money on coke, booze, gambling, and women, and discovered that when it was all gone so were all his "friends." Though he was a good Jewish boy, he pulled down a job slopping pigs. He was so hungry he even ate what the pigs were eating. Finally he figured out that he'd be better off going and facing his old man, telling him that he didn't expect to be his son anymore, but that he'd really appreciate it if he could be one of his Father's slaves. They had it better than he did in his current state.

So he gathered his strength, swallowed some of his pride and headed for home. I can see him trudging home practicing the speech in his head. "Dad, I f'd up. Please let me just come and live as one of your slaves. I won't screw up again." As he was walking toward home. While he was still a long way off actually, his Dad saw him, gathered up his robes so he wouldn't trip and took off running to meet him. When he got to him he practically fell on him and embraced him.

The son started to blurt out his now well rehearsed speech, but the Father shushed him. "Sshhh son, you were lost, but now you are found. I am just so glad you've come home." Then he turned and yelled to his slaves, "My son is home, go get some clothes, get him out of these rags. Then slaughter the cow so we can throw a party. My son is home!"

Many of you know that in so many ways I have been the son in that story. My Dad has been the Dad. later in the story when bad things are said about the younger son, he doesn't listen. He forgives. He holds. He blesses. He chooses to forget. My Dad was this for me.

Now Jesus told the story to the religious establishment. They were the Christian Coallition of their day. They created the moral measuring stick that was used to measure the morality of the day -- much like the modern day church has done in this nation. We need to hear it too. Because like them, we love our place in the world more than we love the world.

We're supposed to be like the Father in the story. We're supposed to be the Father in the story to the world. And we fail, and we go about our own agendas, and we become the Prodigal son ourselves.

At the low point of my life, when I came to the realization that I was completely failing, and had no hope of succeeding, when I faced my own falaciousness, and saw that I was but another hollow man, a counselor in Philly gave me a book by Henri Nouwen. It was entitled, The Return of the Prodigal. It came into being because of a painting by the same name by Rembrandt

As I left that community that was so important to me, everyone signed my copy of the book. Chris, one of my friends there, a youth pastor from the mid west circled the son, drew an arrow and labeled him "the church". It has taken me until now to realize how right he was.

All those that listened to Jesus tell this story would have connected the prodigal with Israel, who had been beaten exiled, and her Temple destroyed. Jesus was telling them that they needed to come back to God. We are not so different though, are we. We are a lot like they were.

The deal is simply this, when you have been a prodigal, you can't stay there. You have to become a Father too. You have to give away that which has been given to you.

As the Church universal we need to move from being the prodigal, to experiencing the Father's love, to becoming the Father for those who are orphans and without hope themselves, the powerless, the lame, the lepers, cripples, widows, and outcasts -- the addicts and alcoholics, the proud and the haughty, those who are now high but will be brought low, and those who are low and looking for a hand up. We need to be the Father. We claim to be the Body of Christ and yet we live as the Pharisees. It has to change.

It is time for us to recognize the slop we are eating and come home.

TS Elliot -- Hollow Man

The Hollow Men

A penny for the Old Guy

I
We are the hollow men
We are the stuffed men
Leaning together
Headpiece filled with straw. Alas!
Our dried voices, when	5
We whisper together
Are quiet and meaningless
As wind in dry grass
Or rats' feet over broken glass	10
In our dry cellar
Shape without form, shade without colour,
Paralysed force, gesture without motion;
Those who have crossed
With direct eyes, to death's other Kingdom
Remember us - if at all - not as lost	15
Violent souls, but only
As the hollow men
The stuffed men.
II
Eyes I dare not meet in dreams
In death's dream kingdom	20
These do not appear:
There, the eyes are
Sunlight on a broken column
There, is a tree swinging
And voices are	25
In the wind's singing
More distant and more solemn
Than a fading star.
Let me be no nearer
In death's dream kingdom	30
Let me also wear
Such deliberate disguises
Rat's coat, crowskin, crossed staves
In a field
Behaving as the wind behaves	35
No nearer -
Not that final meeting
In the twilight kingdom
III
This is the dead land
This is cactus land	40
Here the stone images
Are raised, here they receive
The supplication of a dead man's hand
Under the twinkle of a fading star.
Is it like this	45
In death's other kingdom
Waking alone
At the hour when we are
Trembling with tenderness
Lips that would kiss	50
Form prayers to broken stone.
IV
The eyes are not here
There are no eyes here
In this valley of dying stars
In this hollow valley	55
This broken jaw of our lost kingdoms
In this last of meeting places
We grope together
And avoid speech
Gathered on this beach of the tumid river	60
Sightless, unless
The eyes reappear
As the perpetual star
Multifoliate rose
Of death's twilight kingdom	65
The hope only
Of empty men.
V
Here we go round the prickly pear
Prickly pear prickly pear
Here we go round the prickly pear	70
At five o'clock in the morning.
Between the idea
And the reality
Between the motion
And the act	75
Falls the Shadow
For Thine is the Kingdom
Between the conception
And the creation
Between the emotion	80
And the response
Falls the Shadow
Life is very long
Between the desire
And the spasm	85
Between the potency
And the existence
Between the essence
And the descent
Falls the Shadow	90
For Thine is the Kingdom
For Thine is
Life is
For Thine is the
This is the way the world ends	95
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang but a whimper.