Promises

An Open letter to Maggie, Thomas, Sam and Alex

My Children,

The trip to Florida to get Sam triggered all sorts of emotions and thoughts in me. I’m not going to write anything here that you haven’t heard me articulate to you face to face. I really pray that these things will become a part of you though because they will help you so much as you travel your own life roads.

After the divorce in 2002 you know that I made some new friends that were willing to walk with me when all my old friends decided they didn’t want to (or couldn’t) walk with me anymore because of the bad choices I made which triggered the divorce in the first place. My new friends and I began to walk through life together, sharing each others’ burdens, loving one another unconditionally, the way people in the church are supposed to love each other but oftentimes don’t or can’t.

All of us in this circle of friends knew we were completely broken humans. We knew we needed God in our lives if we were going to have any hope; and we knew that He (God) most often revealed Himself in and through relationships to others. We also knew that we needed to give up being selfish, arrogant, ego-centric and childish if we were going to have any hope of obtaining the lives we wanted; and that our best efforts to do so always failed. God was going to have to take all these bad things in our lives away. The only way He’d do so was if we were entirely ready to let Him.

Guys, I believe with all my heart that we can’t fix what is wrong with us without help: help from God and from our fellows ( I know I can't). My best efforts to do so led me into a lonely and isolated life that ended in divorce and brokenness, hurting you.

Among my friends, I found a couple of guys (Dog Mike, and David – you know them) that had a bunch of stuff in their lives that I wanted in mine and who had been walking the path longer than me. I asked them to mentor me, passing on the stuff that they had picked up along the way . THey said they would and so now I get to tag along with them.

Dog Mike passed on three things that have become foundational to how I live. They are the three legs to the stool I sit on. You’ve heard them all and I list them in no particular order:

1. If I am disturbed the problem is in me.
2. What other people think of me is none of my damn business. And the corollary: what I think of myself is none of my own damn business either.
3. If I spot it I got it.

When I can remember these things, keep God in the center and lean on He and my friends (Including Michelle) I am OK. Nothing can touch me. Throw me your worst and it won’t really matter. I can deal with any amount of pain. I can make it. I can do what's asked of me: love God (by expressing gratitude to Him for all that is coming my way) and love those along my path that day. Let me go through each of them again for you, because I really, really want you to get a hold of these things, long before I did. You will live life so much more fully when you get hold of these truths. The grass will e greener. The sky will be bluer. The joy will be deeper, the pain more intense, the laughter more frquent, and the peace beyond aything you have ever known.

“If I am disturbed the problem is in me.”  

If this isn’t true we get tossed around on a stormy emotional sea because other people in our life have too much power. They can make us feel stuff. They have power in our life that no one but God should have.

This means that even when there are disturbing events around me: a fight with Michelle, or my boss doesn’t like the way I am doing my job, or money isn’t there for basic things that we need or want, or anything else you can think of – the part of the equation I can address is inside of me. Is God still in control? Does He still love me? Can I still trust Him? Am I doing my best? Doing the next right thing?

If the answer to those questions is, "yes," then I can rest because I can let go of what is going on; giving it up to the care of God. I can cease fighting to get the outcome I want and simply rest. If the answer to any of these is no, the solution is to change things so that the answers can all be “yes.” And since God doesn’t change, the problem lies in me and needs to be addressed.

I no longer can say, “If only that were different…; if only I had that…; if only they would… then I would be OK.” No, now I have to say, “God, what has to change in me so that I can be OK in spite of the way the world is coming at me? Help me to find gratitude for all this shit!” (Go ahead, say, "shit" when you pray. If you can't say it to Him then probably you shouldn't say it at all.)

“What other people think of me is none of my damn business… and the corollary: what I think of me is none of my damn business either.”

Since other people other than you guys are reading this, some of them might be offended y the word, “Damn”. I’d apologize but in this instance the word is used correctly. When I make what other peoples’ opinion of me my business I damn myself. As  a pastor it is what I did for thirteen years. I pastored as much out of fear of peoples opinions of me – of my positional sense – that I lost sight of caring what God thought of them or me.

By default, if I am caring about what people think about me, I am not caring about them. How can I love well when I merely want to make them happy? I can’t. How do I discipline you guys when I know it is going to make you angry with me? How do I say “no” to things you want to do when I know it will only serve to upset you and make you angry with me? I do it because I love you and want what is best for you. What you think about me is of little consequence. Love is all that matters. I have to do the next righ thing.

This makes sense if we really believe that “If I am disturbed the problem is in me. Too often I live for others approval. I’m a good Dad the moment I stop trying to look like a good Dad and start loving. When I try to look like a good Dad, I become a fraud. Every day I have to surrender my right to care what other people (including you) think of me. I surrender my right to look good. I surrender my right to not look bad. I surrender my right to succeed. I surrender my right to not fail.

For too much of my life – all of my first marriage – I put most of my energy into “being somebody”. This meant that energy that belonged to love was absorbed by self. While it appeared to others that I was loving (because I figured out very early that “looking selfless” made me look good) I was really doing good things and saying loving things out of selfish motives. Love wasn’t the motive. Self was the motive. Because of this I ended up broken and alone. I don’t want this for you. Fortunately for me, my God is a God of resurrection. Death always precedes real life. I needed all of the pain, and all of the brokenness to be someone that has any love to offer.

Did you see that I said, “Everyday I surrender my right…” it is because I am human and I forget. Jesus said, “Take up your cross, daily…” It is not a one time event. For me it is much more frequent event. That is why you often see the bumper sticker, “One day at a time”. It is the only way that many of us have found to live, “Surrendering, one day at a time…” I am not capable of much more than that.

If I spot it I got it…

People hate this one. Do you know though that when you spot something in someone else it is because of some shadow memory in you that causes you to see a similar shadow in someone else? Typically, we see something in someone else that bothers us. The reason this is true is because we are seeing our own shadows cast across the other person. The truth of this statement doesn’t take away from what may be true about the other person, but really what I need to worry about is where it is true in me, because “If I am disturbed the problem is in me.” (not them)

Let me point out that sometimes we see good things in others that need to remind of us of the good in us. If we see someone else growing we can rejoice because we are growing enough to recognize growth in the other. If we see kindness in another, it is because there is a measure of kindness in us. If we see giftedness in another it is because there is giftedness in us that recongnizes it.

This comes in handy when others say hateful things about us. If we are really connected (and this is extremely hard to do) we end up praying for the other because they are really telling us something of themselves. Once again, it doesn’t mean that we don’t need to pay attention. We may need to pay attention to the deficits they are pointing us to without being overcome by the accusation. It is not in our best interest to care what they think about us. But it may be in our best interest to look at ourselves and our deficiencies so we can give them to God and not stress them. This is different from caring what the person thinks about us. It is being willing to be honest with ourselves and listen to what God may be saying to us about how we need to change.

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So there you have the three legs of my resting stool. I forget them all the time. I have to be reminded of them all the time. It is why I hang with the friends I do, because they remind me of what I need to do to live moving toward God and love rather than away from him toward loneliness, isolation, and outer darkness. I moved that direction for a lot of years and so I have a long road ahead of me (the rest of my life actually) to move back to the center; back to God; back to love.

I don’t want you to have to walk as far into the darkness as I did. You deserve better than that. And so I write, loving you with all my heart; you being the reason I breathe; reminding myself as I type of the truths I need to remember to love you well.

Live and love well, guys. Love as I’ve loved you. Love as God loves you. Offer grace where you want to hate. Offer forgiveness instead of justice. Give up your need to be right. Cease fighting anyone and anything. Take up your own crosses daily. Physically get on your knees

as you get out of bed every morning and pray something like, “God, I give myself to you today so that you can do whatever you want with me; growing me however you want to (even if I don’t like it, help me trust you.) Please help me get over myself and my own selfishness today so I can love the way you want me to. Today will you deal with all my problems so that other people will see your power and your love, trust, and follow you too. I want to be absorbed in love today.”

 

A biblical exegesis of step 9

Step 9:  Made Direct Amends to such people wherever possible except when to do so would injure them or others.

          Though I shouldn’t have been, I was quite surprised when I began looking at the Biblical directives to make amends – “confess”. My mind went immediately to a well known passage in James, “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” (chapter 1 v 6. Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved. ) This passage has long been important to me because it plays a significant part in my Mum’s story of asking the elders at church to pray over her for healing and having the cancerous tumor in her abdomen disappear literally, overnight.

            The passage has drastic connotations. Normally when we “go to church,” we put our game faces on. People sitting next to us in the pews know very little of what is really going on in our lives. The idea of a “shared life” is as foreign as living in the Falkland Islands (unless of course you’ve lived there or currently live there.)

            It is a shame that we have lost the reality that what unites us is not our strength and shared “victory in Jesus,” but rather our brokenness and need of His power in our life every day to simply live the way that He designed us and asks us to. Instead of sharing the reality of a marriage in crisis and kids in rebellion we feel the need to manage our image and pretend that we’re leading our perfect middle class family through the rough seas of a broken planet. We want others to think of us as better than we are because when we look at others, they seem so much more “put together” than we feel. The James passage is in direct contrast to this and gives us a way to live in real relationship that is so counter-intuitive to our natural way of thinking.

            Now, while all of this is true, it does not quite get at the specific directive of the 9^th step. “Confession,” in this instance, is not about “making amends.” It is about being honest and being real which are bigger principles we need to grapple with before we ever get to the action of making amends. This is not to say that God has nothing to say on the subject, but like His disciple Martin Luther, he has a way of saying things all over the place so we hear them all over the place, if we will but listen.

Below are a few more of His words on the subject.

"Or suppose you make a foolish vow of any kind, whether its purpose is for good or for bad. When you realize its foolishness, you must admit your guilt.5 "When you become aware of your guilt in any of these ways, you must confess your sin. -- Lev 5:4-6 (Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved. )

Here is the scene, The children of Israel have left Egypt and are in route to the Promised Land. God is giving them direction on how they are to live life together. Very early on in his list of instructions (kind of like a list you leave for your teenagers when you are leaving them at home for the first time for a weekend) of how to live together. Here is my paraphrase, “When you are stupid, admit it and make it right.”

We all do stupid things. Many of us do them again and again. When we fall into this pattern we lose trust with people around us. When we make promises and don’t follow through. When we continually do same irritating thing that bothers or wrongs our co-workers or family members. When we keep making mistakes that cost our teammate’s games or trophies, it has become too easy to merely say, “I’m sorry.” It loses its meaning. Words evaporate in the air and all that is left is disappointment and a building vow never to trust that person again.

The writer of Leviticus says, “Confess your sin.” Now to a 21^st century reader those three words are loaded because the word, “sin” is loaded, and “confession” is misunderstood. “Sin” here is simply missing the mark. And confession has in implied, “it won’t happen again” attached to it.

In AA members are taught a simple formula, “I was wrong. I hope you will forgive me. How can I make it right?” Those outside of twelve-step fellowships could learn from this.

Feeling badly about what you did (I’m sorry) means very little, really. You can feel badly for a whole gamut of reasons: people think less of you, you feel less of yourself, you hurt someone, etc… Why you are sorry is anyone’s guess. Acknowledging wrong however lets people know that you know you are not perfect, and that you screwed up. Asking how you can make it right lets them know you want to make up for what you did to the best of your ability. God has more to say on this a little later.

 In Num 5:6-8 (still more or less the same section of Scripture as Leviticus) God has this to say: "Give the following instructions to the people of Israel: If any of the people—men or women—betray the Lord by doing wrong to another person, they are guilty. 7 They must confess their sin and make full restitution for what they have done, adding an additional 20 percent and returning it to the person who was wronged. 8 But if the person who was wronged is dead, and there are no near relatives to whom restitution can be made, the payment belongs to the Lord and must be given to the priest. Those who are guilty must also bring a ram as a sacrifice, and they will be purified and made right with the Lord.* (Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved.)

 Here God is a little more specific: Confess your sin and then make restitution to those you wronged – 120% of the cost of the wrongdoing. And if the person and / or his family is no longer alive give the 120% to God.

 Someone may ask why God has this in his list of instructions and God answers in the Psalm 32:3-5: When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long. 4 Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat.Interlude  5 Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, "I will confess my rebellion to the Lord." And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.(Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved. )

 This was a lesson that I learned too late in life: I confess because it is good for me. I do not confess for the good of the other person. I confess in order to maintain my own connection to my Creator. I do not have the power to break the connection of the person I wronged or re-connect it. I only have the power to keep my connection in place. I do not make amends for the other person. I make amends for me and in so doing restore my connection to my Creator and allow for the possibility of ongoing relation to the other person. Our ongoing relationship ultimately relies on their relationship with their Creator. The only way any of us have any relationships at all are if God is in the middle either intentionally or completely unrecognised – but that is another post in and of itself.

 We will end with 1 John 1:8-10: “If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. 9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.(Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved.)

 Part of being human in a fallen world is a demand to be god. We live in a universe that is running away from its centre. Scientists tell us that there was a big explosion and since that moment in time each piece of the universe is moving at extraordinary speed toward complete isolation, away from all other created objects, away from that awful explosion that sent us careening out of control away from our Creator. (Well the scientists don’t say that last bit.)

 We are but microcosms of the macro picture. We too in our natural state are moving away from the centre, which is our Creator, and in so doing we can’t help but move away from our fellows. It is simply the trajectory that by our nature we were created on. The only way to find true union is to change trajectories, turn around and move back toward the centre, toward union with God and our fellows. That requires the death of our natural self which wants to be self-sufficient and is grandiose and fragile.

 Our natural trajectory is way off the mark. In and of itself it is leading us toward a world of aloneness and pain. God’s word for it in John’s letter is “sin”. I find that the word is unhelpful though because it is so loaded. Word’s have pictures and “sin’s” word picture for me and many like me simply doesn’t work.

 To get a better picture of what God is saying that does work, I’ll accept: sick, going the wrong direction, got on the wrong freeway, self-centred, ego-centric, etc… because all those words paint a picture that I can accept. John may say, “If we say we have not sinned…” I will say, “If you think everyone is not ego-centric and self centred…”

 Come on, we all have, we all do… the 9^th step is simply about admitting how broken and foolish we are. We can laugh on the back side of things… “You know what an idiot I was… I remember when…” everyone laughs because we’ve all been there. That is confession.

 

That is the 9^th step. I need to add one note here. The end of the 9^th step states: “Except when to do so would injure them or others.” Above I stated that the reason we make amends is for ourselves. Now while this is true, it is true within the confines of love.

 It is wrong form me to unload my dump truck of guilt on your head so that I can feel better about myself knowing that in so doing I am turning your world on its head and destroying any foundation you may have.

There are Christian counsellors here in my city that argue that a complete “dump” has to be made for restoration to occur. I could not disagree more. I love you first, and in loving you I tell you the truth, and commit to being completely truthful with you, but I do not dump on you. Perhaps that should also be explored further in another post.

What is important is that we recognize that Bill Wilson figured some things out when he wrote these steps down that allowed alcoholics and addicts that wanted recovery to find a way to connect with God and find life free from drugs and alcohol. Those same steps can work for anyone that wants to connect with Jesus.

 

Two Authorities

From: As Bill Sees It

Many people wonder how A.A. can function under a seeming anarchy. Other societies have to have law and force and sanction and punishment, administered by authorized people. Happily for us, we found that we need no human authorities which are far more effective. One is benign, the other malign. There is God, our Father, who very simply says, "I am waiting for you to do my will." The other authority is named John Barlicorn, and he says, "You had better do God's will or I will kill you."

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 The A.A. Traditions are neither rules, regulations, nor laws. We obey them willingly because we want to. Perhaps the secret of their power lies in the fact that these life-giving communications spring out of living experience and are rooted in love. (1. A.A. COMES OF AGE, P. 105 2. A.A. TODAY, P. 11)

I posted this because of my previous posts on authority. there were so many questions from well-meaning "church people" who simply baulk at the idea of authority that is lived out daily in 12 step rooms. Bill Wilson in his usual crisp and clear manner seems to go to the heart of the matter.

I can't help but think that we have too long neglected the role of the Spirit (cf Jer. 31.31) because of a tradition handed down by earthly authorities that created human authority in reaction to very real problems and confusion left over by a church that was making a mess as it tried to live faithfully in those early centuries. 

Historically speaking, the real problem hit when Contstantine co-opted the church for the State's and his personal gain in the 4th century. In one fell swoop, authority in the church was turned on its head. I realize that more words need to be written on this and after I finish writing on the steps I will certainly revisit the subject.

The 5th step's indictment

From the very beginning of our story, the result of our attempt to be like God is a compulsion to hide from each other and from Him.

Gen 3:1-13

 The serpent was the shrewdest of all the wild animals the Lord God had made. One day he asked the woman, "Did God really say you must not eat the fruit from any of the trees in the garden?"

2 "Of course we may eat fruit from the trees in the garden," the woman replied. 3 "It's only the fruit from the tree in the middle of the garden that we are not allowed to eat. God said, 'You must not eat it or even touch it; if you do, you will die.'"

4 "You won't die!" the serpent replied to the woman. 5 "God knows that your eyes will be opened as soon as you eat it, and you will be like God, knowing both good and evil."

6 The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. 7 At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves.

8 When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man* and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees. 9 Then the Lord God called to the man, "Where are you?"

10 He replied, "I heard you walking in the garden, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked."

11 "Who told you that you were naked?" the Lord God asked. "Have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?"

12 The man replied, "It was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit, and I ate it."

13 Then the Lord God asked the woman, "What have you done?"

"The serpent deceived me," she replied. "That's why I ate it."

Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved.

What we know to be true of ourselves; what we fear about ourselves – that “we are not as strong as we think we are,” leads us to hide, and then, if discovered, point our fingers at others attempting to shift the blame. We know we are broken and in need of repair; that if people knew what we knew to be true about us, they would abandon us to our own company. We think – no, we know – that if others knew what we knew, we’d die alone with no friends or family to mourn or miss us.

One way of describing the redemption story is that it is a story of restoration of relationship – an end to the necessary hiding away of our secrets. In this story, God provides a way for people to come out of hiding and into the light. As they do they discover love, joy, freedom, hope, and peace.

Recovery is about bringing out into the light the hidden and secret lives we live internally. It is about giving voice to the selfishness; acknowledging the narcissism; admitting the grandiosity, childishness, and oversensitivity. Recovery gives a forum for people to heal the wounds of shame by telling others what they swore they would never tell anyone, and being loved for doing so.

This is the place that the church is supposed to shine. James tells us: “Make this your common practice: Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can live together whole and healed.” (James 5: THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved.). Peter encourages us: “Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.( 1 Peter 4:8-9 Holy Bible, New Living Translation ®, copyright © 1996, 2004 by Tyndale Charitable Trust. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers. All rights reserved.). We don’t do this in the church very well.

 The thing that frees me to truly love is that I know I am truly loved. I am not loved because of my accomplishments, my looks, my intellect, or my charisma. I am loved because others share my weaknesses. They see my weaknesses in themselves and so they love me; for to reject me would mean a rejection of hope of redemption for themselves. Because I know I am loved no matter what; I am free to love. I am free to confront. I am free to face rejection of others. None of it matters because I am loved and that is enough.

 This is the core of the 5^th step. All our shit is laid at the foot of the cross. It is laid bare. We don’t bury it from our own view or try to hide it from God. Another human being who has travelled the path ahead of us helps us negotiate the sea of crap that we fear will drown us. They help us see things we are incapable of seeing on our own.

 The only way we can take this step, turning from shame to grace, is because the 5^th step comes after the 2^nd. Many who attempt a fourth and fifth step drown in the stench of their own shame. Their god (idol) is too small to handle their filth, and cleanse them. Their 2^nd step was lacking.

 For the follower of Jesus, this is where we glory in the cross. Many in the church today acknowledge the cross verbally and give it a cognitive and cursory nod, while never allowing the reality of God’s cosmic grace and forgiveness to affect their own attitudes toward those around them. This is the experience of many with the visible church. It is probably it’s most stinging indictment, and has driven countless numbers away from Jesus to any other idol that will offer them a temporary reprieve from the sting of their guilt and shame.

 

A Twelve Tradition Church?

Today Shell and I hosted a conversation about the 12 traditions I created the following paper as a starting point for our discussion. I made one change that was suggested already in Tradition 12. I work things out by writing and getting feedback. It happened tonight. Lets see what happens here.

Twelve Traditions for the Church

Tradition 1:    Our common welfare should come first; the Kingdom of God depends on our unity. This demands humility and acknowledges our own humanness.

“The church couldn’t be more divided if God had commanded it and Christ had prayed for it.” – Rich Read.

The Church has tried to force unity around perceived strengths rather than acknowledged and shared weaknesses.  It tends to focus on what it thinks it knows rather than a shared experience of “not knowing, searching, failing” and still being loved.

We tend to disregard the journey focusing our attention on the destination. In so doing we miss much of what God has for us, and we tend to make our journey an imperative (“you have to do things my way,” or “believe what I believe”) rather than simply a story of how we’ve encountered the living God.

If our common welfare comes first this means that we need to walk with each other, and share in each other’s journeys rather than try to tell each other how to walk. Unity means sharing our experience, strength, and hope as we encounter God – wherever we encounter Him.

In a very real sense, salvation is found together, in our shared story rather than my individual story. Together we will create a living theology that breathes and changes as our world changes that expresses God’s infinite love for Himself and for us in ongoing relationship.

Tradition2:     For us there is but one authority – a loving God who exists in eternal, perfect loving relationship. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.

"This is the brand-new covenant that I will make with Israel when the time comes. I will put my law within them — write it on their hearts! — and be their God. And they will be my people. They will no longer go around setting up schools to teach each other about God. They'll know me firsthand, the dull and the bright, the smart and the slow. I'll wipe the slate clean for each of them. I'll forget they ever sinned!" God's Decree.  Jer. 31:33-34 (from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved.)

 

The idea that each of us can really know God – indeed that this is what He wants – is a dangerous idea because if followed to its conclusion it destroys the “clergy class.”

This passage’s promise is for now. We hire people to help us “know God” better. Maybe because it is easier; maybe because we don’t really believe that we can know Him without paying them. We are scared that we’ll miss the boat if we don’t do it right. God is too important to mess up. We better do it right. We better hire the pro’s to make sure we don’t screw it up. In so doing we can miss Him altogether. That is the sad irony of our choice.

We will meet God as we share life and our journeys with one another. God is big enough to speak through the child, the mentally challenged, the broken, and the simple. We simply need to listen and trust the Spirit to move in our midst.

God will govern. People won’t. The Spirit will make this happen. So long as we hold fast to tradition 1 we should be OK.

 

Tradition 3:    The only requirement for membership is a desire for more of a relationship with Jesus.

Caesar demanded people pronounce, “Caesar is Lord.” No follower of Jesus could ever make this pronouncement and so often they were thrown to the lions or given over to the sword.

St. Paul states that no one can ever say, “Jesus is Lord,” apart from the Spirit of God working in their heart and life. (1Cor. 12:3) This is probably the best measure of whether a Christian will share communion with another – can they say, “Jesus is Lord?” If they can, invite them in and sup with them; Fellowship with them and worship with them for they are your brother or sister.

For our purposes, someone belongs to Christ when they say they belong to Christ. The question of Lordship – indeed the question of relationship – is answered by surrender.

“Here is my life Lord, have with me and do with me as Thou wilt. I trust you, and where I don’t help me to trust more.” It is here that we find the solution to all of our problems. The more we trust, the more trust is demanded of us, and the more grace is given to trust more, and our relationship with God grows.

 

Tradition 4:    Each congregation should be autonomous except in matters affecting other congregations or the Kingdom of God as a whole.

Each congregation will be wise to tend to its own issues, allowing other congregations to tend to theirs. If a partnering congregation is violating the traditions laid out here then they may need to be called to the carpet if it going to affect Kingdom work.

This tradition goes back to the idea that no one governs but God. This being the case, let God govern each congregation. Congregations need to let the Spirit mold other congregations however He chooses.

Tradition 5:    Each congregation has but one primary purpose – to carry the gospel to those still suffering and in need of hope.

Let’s be clear, when God said the Church was the “Body of Christ,” He meant that it was to carry on the work the physical man, Jesus; which He performed during his three year ministry.

If we can understand Jesus’ purpose, how He lived and what He did, we will be well on the way to discovering how we are to live together.  Jesus came to proclaim good news to the broken and the desperate. We are to do the same.

We are to proclaim hope in faith; live joyously in peace; and live such good lives that people will want what we have. When necessary we might even use words.

 

Tradition 6:    No congregation should endorse, finance, or lend our name or Jesus’ name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property or prestige divert us from our primary purpose.

There will be no political platforms allowed. There will be no social movements promoted. We will not participate in the Kingdom of this world in any of its forms. The Kingdom of this world is manifest through any attempt to “take power over” another person or community. This is central to all the traditions.

 

Tradition 7:    Every congregation ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.

No grants will be written. No matching funds accepted. Nor will we engage in any fundraising activities outside of the congregation.

Tradition 8:    The Church should remain forever non-professional. But we may employ people for service and administrative positions that allow the church to function.

The gospel needs to be free. For our purposes, professionalism is defined as “paying people to proclaim the gospel,” or “counsel those in need of the gospel.” This tradition insures that anytime someone needs to meet Jesus, he will be introduced free of charge. The gospel needs to be free.

Having said that, child care may need to be provided; at some point administration may be necessary and so workers in support and service related positions may be paid to make the mission of the congregation run more smoothly. Stipends may be given to cover travel and housing expenses of speakers.

Tradition 9:    We ought never to endeavor to be organized, but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.

Too often people end up serving the structures they create to make their church run smoothly. The structures meant to serve them end up being cruel task masters, stripping away the joy of service and giving. People feel they are serving the machine rather than the people the machine was created to serve.

This tradition fights against this tendency. Twelve tradition congregations need to be minimalistic. Service boards can be created where necessary. They serve the congregation as a whole, answer to them, and are temporary in nature, disbanding after the task is completed.

Tradition 10:  We have no opinions on outside issues hence our name (and the Name of Jesus) ought never be drawn into public controversy.

Intrinsically connected to tradition one and six above, this tradition makes sure we focus on our primary purpose and keeps us out of the court of public opinion.

Tradition 11: Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we always need to maintain anonymity at the level of press, radio, TV, films and the internet.

If our message is true; if the Spirit of the Living God really does transform our lives; it will be self-evident. We will not have to argue people into the Kingdom of God. People will see that we have discovered life and want in. This has to be at the heart of everything. Either Jesus is who He said He was; capable of what He claimed; or He is not. Our lives will be judged by those wondering about His claims.

For too long the church has wanted its words to proclaim life rather than its life to demonstrate the changes wrought by the Spirit in them over time. We are committed to the latter and firmly reject the former.

 

Tradition 12:  Humility (A complete disregard for our positions, standing, or value in the Kingdom of the earth) is the Spiritual foundation of all our traditions ever reminding us to place principles above personalities.

In the original traditions the word is “anonymity.” It might still fit here. There were three primary reasons for anonymity in the original 12 step / 12 tradition fellowships: 1) to protect the alcoholic from public humiliation 2) to protect the fellowship from bad publicity, and perhaps most importantly 3) To remove social status from the recovery rooms.

For our purposes, protecting the anonymity of the individual is not an issue. However, the next two reasons might be.

Many will argue that we need to protect the congregation from the idiocy of individual followers of Jesus.  When a person does something embarrassing that could damage the name of Jesus, it is far better if they don’t proclaim themselves to be doing it in the name of Jesus or His body on earth – the Church.

All of us can probably agree that there can be no “outside status” in the Kingdom of God. A doctor and a janitor are equals – both in need of as much grace as the other. A stay at home mom needs as much grace as a high powered executive. The world’s status positions cannot exist in the church.

An Evening to Remember

This was forwarded to me by an old friend: It is definitely worth the read:

What the Graham team continues to communicate with or without words

A few days ago I journeyed to The Cove—the Billy Graham Training Center in Asheville, North Carolina—to participate in a small two-day discussion between pastors and business leaders. After dinner on the first evening, we guests were honored by a visit from Billy Graham, Cliff Barrows, and George Beverly Shea. Barrows is in his eighties, Graham his nineties, and Shea his hundreds (yes, he's 102).

For an hour the three men chatted back and forth, reminiscing on their 65-year partnership in world evangelization. Barrows and Shea sang a few of the songs that were often featured at Graham crusades in the past. They even coaxed Billy into joining them for one of them. The three told many stories and remembered "inside jokes" they'd played on one another. But always the focus of the conversation was their indelible joy over the tens of thousands who had crossed the line into faith in Jesus Christ as a result of their efforts.

Throughout the hour Barrows, Graham, and Shea expressed great affection and appreciation to each other in ways that made us all realize that each was conscious that there might not be another occasion quite like this one when the three of them would be together again. Aging at this advanced point, you must understand, makes moments like these precious beyond understanding.

Watch three men like this who have lived a lifetime of kingdom-service, and you are reminded of the words of E. Stanley Jones who wrote toward the end of his life, "My song is a life-song. Not the temporary exuberance of youth that often fades when middle and old age sets in with their disillusionment and cynicism …. No, I'm 83, and I'm more excited today about being a Christian than I was at 18 when I first put my feet upon the way." Ditto: these three.

As I listened to these remarkable old men speak of God's faithfulness in their lives, my memory went into overdrive.

My first experience with Cliff Barrows—music director and crusade coordinator—came when I was just 16 years old, a student at a New York boarding school. It was 1956, the year of Billy Graham's historic, four-month crusade at Madison Square Garden. On one of those days, a schoolmate of mine and I took the train into the city, found the "Garden," and sneaked in a side door. It was midday and the arena was empty except for one solitary figure sitting on the edge of the stage shuffling papers. It was Cliff Barrows.

When he saw my friend and me, he put his papers aside and swiftly walked in our direction. "I'm Cliff," he said when he reached us. "Welcome to the Garden. Where are you from?" We told him we had come to the city hoping to be part of the event that night. I shall not forget his response.

"Well, let's see how we can make that happen." He took us to the stage where there were three or four rows of chairs right behind the podium. Barrows pointed to those seats. "Where do you think you'd like to sit, second or third row?" We were astonished! And when we realized he was serious, we pointed to two seats in the second row. He immediately took paper and wrote, "Reserved for Gordon MacDonald." Doing the same for my friend, he placed the papers on the seats we had chosen.

"Now let's find a way to get you back into the Garden tonight," he said. Taking us to a small office outside the arena area, he spoke to a security guard. "These two young men need passes for the side door. Please make that happen." And the man did.

When Barrows left us in the following moments, he said, "Now, boys, pray for Mr. Graham tonight while he preaches. That's why I've got you up there."

 

And we did. I think I grew a foot taller and several years older that day, thanks to Cliff Barrows.

Some years later as a seminary student, I had my first chance to meet Mr. Graham personally. "Billy, I'd like you to meet Gordon MacDonald," my introducer said.

I was a 24-year-old scrawny, somewhat unpromising kid, struggling to pass basic seminary courses, and I was one of many being introduced to Billy Graham. What do I remember about that moment? That he fixed his piercing eyes upon me, extended his hand and said, "Mr. MacDonald, it's an honor to meet you." Mr. MacDonald! He addressed me as if I were a peer or someone "superior" to him. Oh, the dignity of the moment for me. For the space of about—I'm guessing—ten seconds, he connected with me and it seemed as if the two of us were the only people in the room. For weeks I bathed in that awesome moment in which this extraordinary man poured value into me. Such a tiny encounter: such an unforgettable moment.

I know it sounds like an exaggeration, but ever since that moment when I shook Billy Graham's hand, I have always tried to replicate that same sense of intensity of interest any time I have been introduced to anyone.

And now, the other evening, I sat and watched three very aged men do their best to make us, we visitors to The Cove, feel welcomed and honored. Their singing was a tad off key. Their words were halting as they taxed their memories for the right ones to express themselves. Their eyesight and their hearing were obviously impaired. Their physical limitations were apparent. But they filled the room with grace, and I was tearful and awed. They are still bringing people to Jesus.

When a godly person grows old—Simeon and Anna in the temple come to mind—and reaches the twilight in a life of faithfulness, there is no need to be musically on key or smooth with words. The fact is that one's Spirit-filled presence is all that is needed to bring others blessing.

When the evening was over, we milled around these three saints trying to offer appropriate words of thanks, snapping pictures with them and with one another, seeking to sort out our own thoughts about what it's like to occupy a small piece of holy ground (or floor in this case) where you are in the presence not of celebrity but of men who have walked with God.

Do you think any more like them are coming down the pipeline?

Gordon MacDonald | posted 5/24/2010

Theology and the Fourth Step

Note: This is a really long post. I am sorry for that. I hope it proves helpful though. I quote extensively from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous Here. 

I don't think many people other than alcoholics really know what AA, and other fellowships which have followed in its footsteps, teach. This is meant to begin to remedy that. Bob Seger kicks it all off with Lock and Load off "It's a Mystery" released in 1995:

Jesus Plays Oldtimer

There is a story found in Mark’s gospel where Jesus states the same thing that the old timer says, “You need to remember one thing, there is a God and you’re not him; and there is one thing you need to change: everything.” Here is the passage taken from the Message, Eugene Peterson’s paraphrase of the Bible:   

As he went out into the street, a man came running up, greeted him with great reverence, and asked, "Good Teacher, what must I do to get eternal life?"

Jesus said, "Why are you calling me good? No one is good, only God. You know the commandments: Don't murder, don't commit adultery, don't steal, don't lie, don't cheat, honor your father and mother."

He said, "Teacher, I have — from my youth — kept them all!"

Jesus looked him hard in the eye — and loved him! He said, "There's one thing left: Go sell whatever you own and give it to the poor. All your wealth will then be heavenly wealth. And come follow me."

The man's face clouded over. This was the last thing he expected to hear, and he walked off with a heavy heart. He was holding on tight to a lot of things, and not about to let go.

Looking at his disciples, Jesus said, "Do you have any idea how difficult it is for people who 'have it all' to enter God's kingdom?" The disciples couldn't believe what they were hearing, but Jesus kept on: "You can't imagine how difficult. I'd say it's easier for a camel to go through a needle's eye than for the rich to get into God's kingdom."

That set the disciples back on their heels. "Then who has any chance at all?" they asked.

Jesus was blunt: "No chance at all if you think you can pull it off by yourself. Every chance in the world if you let God do it." Mark 10:17-27 (from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved.)

Notice:

  1)         You have a wealthy young guy that is a bit enamored with Jesus. He comes up to him, humbles himself by getting on his knees in front of him, and asks a question.

2)         Jesus doesn’t think he is that humble at all and challenges the man’s preconceived notions immediately, “Why are you calling me good?” No one is good, only God.”

3)         Jesus quotes the second half of the Decalogue, skipping over the four commands that have to do with a human’s relationship with God.

4)         After the man states he has kept all these, Jesus doesn’t challenge him, he simply loves him and adds one additional command, “go sell all that you have and give the money to the poor and follow me…”

5)         The man leaves sad and the disciples are amazed that anyone can enter heaven.

6)         Jesus gives the answer that humans can’t do it but God can.

Most scholars agree this is an authentic part of the gospel message for different reasons. Jesus Seminar scholars argue that they know it is real because Jesus clearly denies that he is God. They misread the text, however. Jesus does not so much deny he is God as He makes sure that the rich young ruler realizes that he is not God. The young man thinks that he is good. That is clear from his comments about his keeping all the commands that deal with his relationships with other humans. He thinks that Jesus is better than him and so by saying, “Why do you call me good, no one is good but God,” Jesus puts the man in his place. “There is a God and you are not him.”

 Jesus does not challenge the man’s “goodness.” Instead he replaces the first four commands of the Decalogue with one simple command, “Get rid of everything you put your trust in, and trust me instead – change everything.”

 And so, the old timer makes statements that parrot what Jesus said 2000 years earlier. “Remember, that there is a God and you’re not him; and remember that there is only one thing you need to change – everything.”

Coming next: one more Biblical exposition and then some basic theology…

Part 2 of Step 1: We admitted we were powerless and our lives had become unmanageable

I grew up reading the New Testament as if it were a personal letter to me rather than to a group called to gather together to live out the Kingdom of God on earth. When “you” becomes plural the New Testament’s meaning shifts. In part that is why, “We admitted we…”

We admit a common problem. We admit two separate but connected truths. If someone misses one of these two truths, they are unable to take this step. Perhaps a story would help here:

Jesus was walking with his ragamuffin followers when this BMW 7 series pulled up. A young, good looking guy hopped out, not caring that he double parked and ran up to Jesus and got down on his knees before him.

“Good teacher, how do I to get to heaven?” he asked.

After Jesus finished setting him straight about calling him “good” (no one is good but G-d) he to obey all of the ten commandments and he listed the second half of them(He skipped the first four commandments that had to do with relating to G-d.)

The man responded as most good conservative Christians would, “I’ve kept all those commands since I was a boy” (or a “wee lad” if you are in Great Britain).

Jesus didn’t contradict him. Instead he stated, “You’re missing one thing. Go sell everything you have and give it away to the poor. Then come and follow me.”

In one fell swoop, Jesus made the claim to be G-d and let the man know that though he felt powerless over his eternal destiny, life was pretty good; too good to give up for something possibly coming tomorrow, and the man left to live his life in comfort and ease.

Lots of people can acknowledge powerlessness without acknowledging unmanageability. Many others can acknowledge unmanageability without acknowledging powerlessness.

In the West we’ve got it pretty good. Even the poorest among us live more comfortably than most of the rest of the world’s population. We have more wealth, and physical health than the world has ever known. We make Solomon look like a pauper.

Only those too weak carry the weight of their own shame or sin, or those so reprobate that they destroy their loves or their own lives seem able to admit their helpless estate.

Very few seem able to see the Matrix for what it is. Even fewer swallow the red pill and see the ruins that surround them. We live our lives in a fog that appears to be crystal clear. That fog hides the real and all too many live in a blissful unreality that ultimately damns them to an eternity of the same nothingness that haunts them from afar everyday of their fallacious lives.

Those that do break under the weight of the lie we all live, often are able to take this step. It is the first step back toward the Garden. It is the first step toward God.

We admitted we were powerless and that our lives had become unmanageable -- step 1

Note: This is the first installment on the steps. I found that I could not complete one step in one post and so we will see how it unfolds as I write...

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“We” – it is a fearfully wonderful word. It is the first word of the first step; often the first word an addict/alcoholic walking into their first meeting might hear from the old timer who greets them: “We’ve all been there… we’ve found… etc…”

“We” is a fearful word for the addict/alcoholic. There is no “we” in the practicing alcoholic/addict’s life. There is only “I.” Indeed, there can’t be a “we” for the addict lives much to most of his life in a world of his own construction that only exists between his own ears. The unreal world that the addiction grants him is preferable to him than the real world he inhabits physically. When one never allows anyone to know them, they cannot be loved; there cannot be “we.” Recovery starts with the promise that our only hope starts with “We.” One of the first things anyone hears is that they never have to do anything alone again.

“We” is a wonderful word to the addict / alcoholic. Everyone who has ever lived needs real connection with another. Often it is the absence of real connection that leads to the addiction in the first place. The addiction gives the illusion of being a real connection; or at least a passable substitute. “We” is what everyone wants, but not at the cost it extracts. “We” takes a lot of work. “We” starts here with this first faltering step toward God and his creation.  

By taking the first step the recovering addict begins to discover the truth and power of the statement that “We never have to do anything alone ever again.” In the fellowship he discovers that he is loved in spite of himself. In fact, he discovers that acknowledgment of his shortcomings only seems to provide him more love from others that recognize their own story in the story he is telling. “We” mysteriously and powerfully comes into view. And with “we” comes hope.

“We admitted…”is something no one seems to do well naturally. An ancient Hebrew story is told that speaks to this whole topic.

A young man has a promise of God’s blessing. Yet his whole life he tried to achieve the promise in his own power. He does well but alienates nearly everyone in the process to the point that his own brother wants him dead.  He was known as “ the manipulator.”

As with all things, he ran out of space to maneuver. He hid his family away to protect them and was left alone where G-d came and wrestled with him. But G-d couldn’t beat him and so G-d, being G-d, injured his hip so he couldn’t wrestle anymore. But still His stubborn creation wouldn’t let go.

“Let go of me!” God commanded.

“I won’t let go until you bless me!” the man contended.

“Who are you?” God asked.

“I am the manipulator!” the man exclaimed.

“You are no longer the manipulator but the one who has wrestled with God and overcome,” God proclaimed.

Until he acknowledged, admitted, confessed, came clean, and owned up to who he was he couldn’t become anyone else.  That is the reality of our world. Addict/alcoholics spend much of their lives running from who they are scared that they are. Until they can admit who they are God can’t change them.

In this instance, what is true for the addict is also true for all mankind. The person that thinks they are “pretty good” with only minor faults, may feel the need for a therapist but certainly not a Great Physician. The humanist is convinced that they can heal themselves. They can’t admit the depths of their own imperfection and their powerlessness to deal with it themselves.

Imagine two glasses. One is filled with the purest water and the other with two-day old urine.  If I pour a little of the pure water into the glass with urine it doesn’t purify the urine, even if I stir it in really well. In the same way, if I pour a little of the urine into the pure water and stir it in really well, no thinking person would want to drink it either. It is not that it is mostly bad. It is not. It is simply that the impurities have defiled all the good. It is not safe to drink.

Until we can admit that we aren’t God and we aren’t as strong as we think we are; that we can’t make it work on our own. We have not taken the first step back toward God.

The end of step 1 is soon to be published. Please pardon the delays. For some reason, these are harder for me to write.